Thoughts While Reading "Passion and Purity"

I'm reading a book, Passion and Purity by Elizabeth Elliot. I guess a lot of people would have read this book before because it's a very famous book. I personally am touched, challenged and amazed by the book and the life she lived.

Elizabeth Elliot was Jim Elliot's wife. In this book, she talked about what she'd gone through when she was in love with him, especially in her spiritual walk with God, or rather, her relationship with God and also the struggles she experienced. She is a college student at that time, and she is very serious about God and loving God.

As I read the book, I start to examine myself and my relationship with God. Am I as serious as her when come to the issue of seeking God's will and pleasing God? Am I willing to sacrifice what I like and love unto God, and trust that He's able to use them according to His will? Am I having enough faith to wait patiently for God and to seek Him?

I really want to love God more, and do His will. I want to draw closer to Him, I want to live for Him. Too many a times I lose focus and strayed away from Him. When I think I'm safe, that's when I'm not safe. When I think I'm close to God, that's when I'm moving further and further away from Him. I really need to humble myself and let God break me again and again, in order to shape and mold me. When pride takes place, I would be blinded and think that I'm so good and do not need God anymore. It stops God's work in my life. When God's hand is not moving in my life, my life would be stagnant and there'll be no growth or improvement.

Jesus gave the parable of the seed falls into the dark earth and dies. Out of its death, comes multiplied life. As Saint Francis prayed, "It is in giving that we receive, it is in pardoning that we are pardoned, it is in dying that we are born to eternal life." Such words with wisdom. Only people who have experienced it can say such a prayer. And I wish I can truly comprehend it as I live my life in God's light.